Joan Ellen Graham died at Cape Cod Hospital on Sept. 22, 2022. The cause was heart failure, the result of complications of diabetes. She was 79.
The daughter of John and Lucille (Roder) Fisher, Joan was born on July 7, 1943 in New York City. She began a career in publishing by writing book jacket copy and settled in Greenwich Village, where she met her husband-to-be Ray Graham, a successful photographer.
In 1966, Joan and Ray quit their jobs, boarded the S.S. Rotterdam, and steamed toward England, not knowing when they might return. They spent months exploring Europe, sometimes sleeping in their car to save money.
Back in New York, they began a family and soon relocated to a sea captain’s house in Brewster. Joan got her real estate license and opened Graham Real Estate, while Ray continued his photography. They operated the Brewster Rooster Antique and Weaving Shop from their barn.
Joan never lost touch with the world of writing and publishing. She worked as events coordinator for Barnes and Noble in Hyannis and wrote plays, fiction, and memoir, supported by her enormous library. Her essay “From Wife to Widow: Reflections on a Husband’s Death” was widely admired.
Later she set up a business called Wordweaver for writing, editing, and proofreading. Joan was a member of the Cape Cod Writers Center and Editorial Freelancers Association.
In 1992, as a volunteer for the Provincetown AIDS Support Group, Joan edited Cape Cod’s Night at the Chef’s Table Cookbook, which assembled some 100 recipes from 40 restaurants that participated in a fundraiser that drew 400 diners.
It would be impossible to list all her passions, interests, and areas of study. In addition to writing and editing, she loved weaving, art, poetry, theater, history, travel, psychology, cooking, and entertaining.
Joan never stopped writing or learning. She attended college later in life, earning degrees from Cape Cod Community College and Lesley University as well as certificates from the New School, Mount Ida College, and Emerson College.
She was always eager to help a friend or stranger in need. Her advice (given only with permission) was always logical yet soothing.
Joan’s and Ray’s home was a nexus for neighborhood gatherings. Friends came for dinner parties around their butcher block table. After Ray died in 2002, Joan began hosting “Sunday at Six” dinners, which continued for the next two decades.
Joan is survived by her sons, Tim Graham and wife Heather Struna of Brewster and Chris Graham and partner Diane Glass of Plymouth; countless close friends; and her beloved cat, Gabby. She was predeceased by her husband, Ray.
In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to PFLAG Cape Cod or WeCan, two organizations Joan volunteered for.
Visiting hours will be 10 a.m. to noon on Oct 29 at Nickerson Funeral Home, 77 Eldredge Park Way, Orleans, followed by a service. There will be a gathering and remembrance (venue to be announced) immediately following the service. Burial will be private.
For online condolences visit: nickersonfunerals.com.
