Supporting Grandparents
To the editor:
The article on grandparenting on the front page of your Aug. 15 issue [“Grandparents Care for More Than 10% of Cape Children”] was eye-opening. I had no idea that issue was so prevalent on Cape Cod.
Your report made me want more information about how people could contribute to the limited resources that are available. I was able to find the Cape Cod Foster Closet online (www.capecodfostercloset.org) and make a donation. They were very appreciative. You can check them out online or visit their storefront in Orleans.
Debbie Canyock
Eastham
More Than a ‘Gay Resort’
To the editor:
I appreciate Dennis Minsky’s love for Provincetown and its natural environment, but by calling for less emphasis on “the gay scene” (“Too Late for Tea?,” Aug. 15, page A3) he reveals just how limited his own perspective is.
“Many of us, gay and straight alike,” he writes, “envision an opportunity for an era where sexual preference is barely relevant to how we live our lives. In fact, many of us already live in that era.”
No, we do not live in that era. We are lucky enough to live in a place where being queer is commonplace, but Minsky should ask some queer people what it’s like when we cross the bridge — or even just pass the Orleans rotary. Ask us why we live here, year-round, and not someplace with lower rents, better health care, and cheaper groceries and gas.
Provincetown is not just a “gay resort”; it is one of a very short list of places where queer people can live, work, and retire with only modest (but not nonexistent) pushback because of our sexual orientation. In contrast, the “broader appeal” Minsky describes (swimming and sailing, recreational fishing, whale watching, birding, and hiking the dunes) can be found in many other places.
Kenneth Sutton
Provincetown
‘Not Gay Enough’
To the editor:
Re “Too Late for Tea?”:
I believe Dennis Minsky’s use of the phrase “sexual preference” was well meaning but misguided. The idea of “preference” implies that the individual has a choice. This may be correct when discussing ice cream flavors or styles of shoes, but it does not apply to sexual orientation. Many studies have proved individuals have no control over what arouses them sexually. To imply otherwise adds fuel to the anti-LGBTQ sentiment growing in this country.
Saying that “sexual preference is barely relevant” denies a long history of trauma and how it currently resonates with LGBTQ people. There is a robust campaign of hatred and prejudice calling for legislation to deny LGBTQ people basic human rights. Queer children are sent to conversion camps to “turn them straight.” People have been disowned by their families because of their sexual orientation.
I understand and applaud the sentiment of heterosexuals embracing their LGBTQ neighbors, but denying that there are differences or downplaying their significance minimizes the experience of the LGBTQ community and the larger community’s role in supporting and allowing that trauma.
The items Minsky lists as getting short shrift in the New Yorker article about Provincetown are all celebrated here in a manner not afforded to the LGBTQ community. The National Seashore protects our precious natural resources. We have the Pilgrim Monument and Pilgrim Park. There’s the Bas-Relief and Portuguese Square and Cannery Wharf. There are numerous streets named after famous artists and Pilgrim settlers.
Missing from all these government-sponsored public spaces is a monument, or a street, or a park, or a museum dedicated to the contributions of the LGBTQ community to Provincetown. Far from being too gay, I believe the town, in this regard, is not gay enough.
Michael Gaucher
Provincetown
Preventing a Debacle
To the editor:
Re “Minutes Reveal Deep Confusion on Select Board,” [Aug. 15, front page]:
I hoped a change in Wellfleet’s town government culture would happen with the release of documents related to the select board’s June 27, 2023 executive session. After reading Sam Pollak’s informative articles and board members Curley and Carboni’s comments, I am uncertain.
As reported, during that meeting “board members questioned Curley on whether there were specific complaints against [Town Administrator] Waldo” and “he didn’t answer.” When asked again, Curley “couldn’t say if there was a specific complaint.”
Curley’s claim that “he intended the meeting to be a preliminary discussion” does not square with the reported facts. Why did Curley email Waldo about a meeting to review complaints against him without informing the other board members? Curley’s June 19 email to Waldo saying “as a personal opinion I think it would be in the town’s best interest to retain your services through at least the fall” does not indicate a “preliminary discussion.”
There were steps along the way where this debacle could have been prevented. When they were first notified, why didn’t Town Counsel Murray or Carboni ask what the specific complaints were? Why was the town’s human resources director not asked to investigate? Is there a written policy for investigating complaints? When allegations are made against town officials or staff, should an independent law firm be hired to investigate?
In addition to the attorney general’s determination that the town violated the Open Meeting Law, the state’s supervisor of records found that the town twice violated the Public Records Law. The personnel exemption of the Open Meeting Law did not protect Waldo, an innocent victim of a smear campaign. Using it improperly in this case effectively muzzled him and helped cover up egregious misconduct.
Mike Shannon
Wellfleet
The Right to Know
To the editor:
Last week’s article on the release of the minutes of the Wellfleet Select Board’s June 27, 2023 executive session showed that two members of the board, Ryan Curley and Barbara Carboni, continue to avoid taking responsibility for keeping the other three members in the dark about a matter of great importance to the town.
Three of us had no idea what was happening between June 19, when Curley wrote to Town Administrator Waldo, Town Counsel Murray, and Carboni about having an executive session to review accusations of misconduct, and that June 27 meeting. We were left out of the multiple conversations that Curley and Carboni were having with the town’s law firm.
Carboni never verified that the purported complaints were not against the town administrator but were in fact against Curley.
This kind of unethical behavior is why I resigned from the board. I left that June 27 meeting filled with shame. Wellfleet’s citizens have a right to know how their elected officials are conducting themselves, especially when their actions are just plain wrong.
Kathleen E. Bacon
Wellfleet
The writer served on the Wellfleet Select Board from 2017 to 2020 and from June 2022 to September 2023.
‘Chicken Foot!’
To the editor:
Once again, a story in our local paper sparks fond memories: “The Domino Effect” [Aug. 15, page A22]. What caught my eye was the front-page picture of women playing dominoes on Jamaican Independence Day. I didn’t know where the game originated, but it being Jamaica makes sense.
When my brother-in-law Tom Murphy retired from the Coast Guard, he and his wife, Pam, moved back home to Wellfleet. One day, after a family cookout, Pam said, “I have a game we learned on our travels. It’s called ‘Chicken Foot Dominoes.’ ” That night we learned to play, and all members of the family joined in. We played late into the night.
From then on, we would clear the table after a meal to play Chicken Foot. The little ones loved the name. Planning strategy, yelling “Chicken Foot!” to prevent an opponent from “going out,” and not getting stuck with the double blank (50 points against you!) are exciting. After birthday parties and Thanksgiving dinners, we would all gather to play dominoes.
When our youngest was three I worked at the Wellfleet preschool. One day I found a set of dominoes made from large card stock. The next day, during free play, Brandon and I taught the other little ones to play Chicken Foot. They matched up their 3-spots to 3-spots, etc. This got them counting and recognizing numbers. It became a regularly played game.
When Brandon moved on to first grade with Mrs. Anderson, he and his buddies told her about the game, and she had me come and teach the class how to play.
Now our sons have grown and have small children of their own. Thanks to your article, I am going to get out the gray vinyl box that holds our dominoes, dust it off, and at the next get-together we will show the young ones how to play.
Happy Independence Day, Jamaica!
Karen Murphy
Wellfleet
Art and Medicine
To the editor:
In your Aug. 8 article on the Forum 24 symposium “What Is an Artist?” Pat Kearns reported that, according to Professor Fred H.C. Liang, “becoming an artist is nothing like becoming a doctor.”
I respectfully disagree with Professor Liang, having trained as both a dancer-choreographer and a neurologist. Similar to becoming an artist, becoming a doctor requires commitment, persistence, and proficiency at skills; highly developed powers of observation; a willingness to live with uncertainty; the courage to not look away from darkness, despair, suffering, and death; and the knowledge that one’s efforts to make an impact are probably futile.
In fact, I know a lot of great doctors who are also artists, musicians, poets, and writers. At Columbia, where I teach, we require our medical students to study art and storytelling in addition to anatomy and physiology.
There’s a reason people speak of the “art of medicine.”
Eliza Miller, M.D.
New York City
The writer is associate professor of neurology at Columbia University Vagelos College of Physicians and Surgeons.
Letters to the Editor
The Provincetown Independent welcomes letters from readers on all subjects. They must be signed with the writer’s name, home address, and telephone number (for verification). Letters will be published only if they have been sent exclusively to the Independent. They should be no more than 300 words and may be edited for clarity, accuracy, conciseness, and good taste. Longer pieces (up to 600 words) may be submitted for consideration as op-ed commentary. Send letters to [email protected] or by mail to P.O. Box 1034, Provincetown, MA 02657. The deadline for letters is Monday at noon for each week’s edition.
